Saturday, November 8, 2008

Busy Saturday, Take Two

Two Saturdays ago I had a busy day planned. Chris was going to work in the morning, arriving home early enough for me to go to a drop in knitting class to get some help with Ellie's Christmas Stocking and the Snowdrop Shawl I'm knitting for my sister to wear in her wedding (date to be determined later), then I was going to a hair cut (cut and color, sadly overdue) and finally because I would already be in town I was going to do some shopping errands with no children in tow!

Instead I got to knitting, spent five minutes talking to the instructor and was called home by Chris, who in a very calm voice said that he thought we might need to go to the emergency room with Harry.

We spent the day at not one but two different hospitals. Harry fractured both bones in his right arm - ulna and radius. He's doing well with it but complains from time to time asking us to take the cast off or telling us that his arm is "not good."

Our experience is a long drawn out story but I came away from the experience with two important lessons. First, the song, "No more monkey jumping on the bed" is an excellent cautionary tale. Harry wasn't actually jumping on the bed, he was on the couch and he didn't fall off exactly, he just flopped down on it in such a way that it snapped his arm bones. But the point is we are employing the phrase, "Harry your bum belongs on the couch not your feet" far more than we ever did before.

The second lesson is that you should always trust your instincts. Chris trusted his that said, "take this child to the ER." When I got home Harry seemed pretty happy and unless we were paying ultra close attention we wouldn 't have really noticed anything was wrong. Chris had the foresite to offer Harry a cookie to take in his right hand and held his left hand down. When Harry wouldn't put the cookie to his mouth, Chris knew something wasn't right.

I trusted my instincts that said that the community hospital closest to where we live just didn't know what they were doing enough for my taste. We took him there initially - it's 20 minutes away and the next closest hospital is an hour, and the big city teaching hospitals are closer to 2 hours away. We were x-rayed and spent a total of 3 hours there and NEVER once saw an orthopedist. Even when the nurse practitioner told us it was fractured and that she was discussing with the ortho over the phone who should handle it. When she asked us if we'd ever been to Children's in the city and I asked her if she thought we should go there instead and she said no that was my first indication something wasn't right. Then she forgot to wet the splint, then she told us to just follow up in a few days the the ortho. As we were getting ready to leave I asked one more time if she thought we should go to Children's Hospital and she said no again.

It just didn't feel right, so I called the pediatrician who pulled the films onto her computer and said, "yes, go to Children's right now."

I'm glad we did. Turns out Harry's arm needed to be set and waiting a few days would have been bad. Very bad. Bad enough that the pediatric orthopedist said things like, "loss of motion" and "inability to use it properly."

We're all doing okay and the full arm cast actually comes off in another week to be replaced by a half arm cast.

But would it make me a bad mother if today, when I've replanned my knitting class and hair cut and errands, to turn off my cell phone?

Saturday, October 25, 2008

If you've stopped by

why not go to this blog from my friends Mrs. Toyreporter and Remo -

One more try

Okay. So I didn't manage to start blogging again. Not sure why I think this time I'll be able to, seeing as I don't even manage to get on Fac3 B00k all that often, but I feel the need to write so I'm going to take a stab at this again.

Life with two children under the age of 3 and a full time job is exhausting at best and at its worst I feel like I signed on for a job I'm totally not qualified for and should, in fact, be committed to some sort of institution. Both kids are great though and I wouldn't change it for the world.

Well. Not working would be nice, but we can't have it all can we?

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Turns out I'm not such a good blogger

I think when I started out I had such high hopes. My posts would be eloquent and I would instantly have a wide readership. I'm not a great writer and when I've sat down to write thought-provoking posts my knack for non-sequetor paragraphs seemed glaring.

So, I'm going to try again and just journal about my life with no expectations for readership or that my blog will save the world!

On that note - my most exciting news about life right now is that I'm just about 22 weeks pregnant with a little girl. My due date is June 25th. I found back at the beginning of October when I thought to myself at lunch one weekday, "hmmmm, I think I should have gotten my period yesterday or the day before." So I stopped at a pharmacy, picked up a test and went back to work. Luckily I work in a fancy wealth management building that has stand along bathrooms not stalls. I took the test and it popped up "Pregnant" almost immediately.

Here's the proof -

We found out it's a girl at our BIG ultrasound on the 6th. I'm not big on being surprised although I envy those that can wait for their patience. And now we're working on prepping Harry for being a big brother. Some of the time he seems to get it, other times he tells me he, too, has a baby in his belly. The other day he told me he had TWO babies in there. TWO!!!!

Friday, October 5, 2007

And another thing

And then, I promise, I'll be done complaining about it.

After reading the Childfree forum, I am left with the distinct impression that members of this group dislike children and therefore dislike people who are pregnant or have children and rarely count them among there friends. If they do have friends with children (or know people with children) they don't want to hear about the children.

Since when do we get to decide what our friends and co-workers talk about. Being in a community means respecting what other people have to say even if you have little interest in it! I don't particularly like cats, but I don't tell people, "hey, I'm allergic to cats, stop talking about Fluffy" when it comes up in conversation. I listen and try to ask questions. It's called making conversation.

It makes me sad to see that there are people out there that will automatically write me off as a potential friend because I might *gasp, horror of horrors* mention that I'm tired that day because Harry woke up four time last night.

Today I stumbled across a blog that the Childfree Group on the before-mentioned forum has been talking about. Complaining that her blog has changed from a knitting blog to a pregnancy blog. Someone even left her an anonymous comment about it!

This is a free country, you have the write to say and read whatever you want. Why is being mean a necessary part of it???

Thursday, October 4, 2007

Why can't I look away?

You know when you see something really terrible or gross or that makes you horribly, horribly angry, like a car accident or surgery on television or B!ll O'Re!lly, and while you know you should look away or move on you just can't?

Well, that's how I feel about the Childfree forum on a hobby-related on-line community I'm a part of. I was browsing through all of the groups when I noticed this one. *It's a new site, there aren't so many groups that you can't look through them all* I don't know what possessed me to read it, but I did. What can I say, maybe I'm a reading masochist?

This forum was set up, as far as I can tell, to bash children and parents. They say they're there to rant about experiences, but all I've read is a lot of hateful words and name calling. Let me back up to say that I fully support people's right to free speech and I know that this group isn't meant for me and I should just STOP READING.

But. I'm just not sure why, in a community that's supposed to be about making connections, it's acceptable to have a group whose sole purpose is to bash another group within the community.

Parents are not an oppressed group (well, we could get into a whole debate about the lack of adequate support in American culture for working parents, health care, childcare etc. but that's another blog post) like say, African-Americans or homosexuals. If there was a group on this community that was solely about gay bashing or that was dedicated to commenting about their negative experiences with African-Americans it would be SHUT DOWN. Why is okay to bash parents with words like "breeders" or to say things like, "The world would be a much better place if I could hit other people's children?"

There are quite a few groups on the site that are about parenting and children, but not a single one of those is about bashing those without children. This got me thinking - the site is predominantly women although there are quite a few men on there too. If the men had groups to support themselves (and they do) and then some of the women set up a group called "We Hate Men," would this be acceptable within the community because the men had a support group?

I realize that it's not my place to post to the Child-Free group and so I'm posting it here:

I say this to all the child-free by choice adults out there - I support your decision to not have children. I'm glad, if you don't want them, that you don't have them. There are plenty of parents in the world who are TERRIBLE and there are those who don't want the kids they do have. Neither of these are good situations. But don't criticize my choice to have children.

Don't ask the question, "why would you want to bring a child into this world." An enormous part of parenting is helping your child to grow into a responsible citizen and be part of the solution. I want people who want to change the world to have children - they're the best hope we have to make a difference in poverty, injustice, hunger, public health.

Don't expect me to keep my children at home because they might interrupt your dinner or not walk fast enough to get out of your way. I want to raise children who can contribute to society and behave in a kind, conscientious way. In order to do that I have to bring them out in public. That's how it works.

I'm not excusing people not supervising their children or allowing their children to be disrespectful of others, but children are CHILDREN. They need the space to behave in an age appropriate manner. It's not okay to expect your child to behave herself at dinner at 9pm when it's her bedtime and she hasn't eaten yet, but if I want to take my child out to dinner at 5 or breakfasts and he's sat there and eaten and played and needs to get up and go outside or shrieks for a second - DEAL WITH IT! It's totally appropriate behaviour, I did it too when I was 2 years old, so did everyone!

I leave you to your forum - I am going to try to stop reading, it only makes me angry, but I ask you this - in an online community what are the rules? Should groups like this be okay?

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

the week (and a half) in review

I've been so busy in the past two weeks that I haven't had time to think, let alone blog.

Last weekend (the one that was almost two weeks ago now) saw a trip to Provincetown to go on a whale watch. This is an annual excursion (at the very least) for my large, non-biologically related, family that lives here on the Cape. Chris and I hadn't gone the past two years and Harry had never been. There were 20+ of us in our group and we were probably joined by another 20 or so strangers. We went on the early morning boat, The Portuguese Princess. We like their trips because they have naturalists from The Center for Coastal Studies, a great organization that works to protect marine mammals. We had a fabulous time and saw at least six different of whales, two of whom stayed near our boat for a good fifteen minutes, allowing me to take these

I got lots of great pictures of Harry, unfortunately they all have friends' children in them and I'm making it a policy to not post pics of other people without their (or their parents') permission. Here's a not so great one of him enjoying a pretzel

That brings us to this past weekend. We went to North Conway, New Hampshire and Fryeburg, Maine with Chris' best friend and his girlfriend. Chris and his friend lived in North Conway for nine months twelve years ago - the winter before we met. They skied and drank a lot of beer. Pre-Harry we used to go up there skiing all the time, but hadn't been since before I got pregnant. It was a lot of fun and it made me want to visit there more often. We stay at our friend's condo, which is right on Mt. Cranmore and enjoyed the fall foliage of the White Mountains.

On Saturday we were planning on visiting Storyland, but Harry fell asleep on the way so Chris and I decided to just drive around while he slept. As we drove up Rt. 16, we suddenly found ourselves at the foot of the Mt. Washington Auto Road.
Neither of us had ever driven to the top, so we decided to pay the fee and drive the eight miles up. It was quite an experience and not for the faint of heart! There were fairly sheer drops on the side with no guardrails. The road was just wide enough for two cars to pass each other and was a 12% incline/decline. Very stressful!

Harry slept the whole way up and woke up just before the summit. It had been about 68 degrees and sunny when we started up the mountain and at the summit it was foggy, overcast and 35 degrees with 75mph wind! It was like a collision course with winter. We got out of the car long enough to snap a picture
Harry didn't like the wind (and neither did I) so we got back in the car and headed back down. If I was in better shape it would have been a great hike - maybe in a year or two!

Sunday and Monday we went over to Hurricane Mountain Road to Fryeburg, Maine to go to the Fryeburg Fair. All I can say was WOW! It's a true country fair with livestock, crafts, demonstrations of all kinds - blacksmithing, ice cream making, music, and even a tractor pull! There were also carnival style attractions, but we only took advantage of the food aspects of that. It was really fun and Harry loved seeing all the animals. We saw


A sow nursing her piglets


There was also a petting area where Harry was too nervous to feed the goats, but Chris had fun doing it!

And as you can see Harry had a wonderful time!

It was a busy long weekend and now we're back at work. This weekend brings the wedding of a dear friend and a jeep club charity ride to Provincetown to benefit a local homeless shelter serving young people. Should be more busy fun!